So while listening to Weezer, at a rather loud volume, I decided that I'm going to write a short syllabus for fledgling garage bands. You may not realize it, but I love garage bands, especially playing in them. I don't do it a lot, but when I do, I make sure there is plenty of distortion, a good loud microphone, and earplugs in my ears. So here goes:
Weapons of choice:
Two guitarists, one of them preferably the lead singer/rhythm guitarist, the other guy the lead guitarist, hopefully with the capability of doing some backround vocals.
One bassist, also a singer
One drummer, hopefully a singer, not a hack like Phil Collins.
Add to this one keyboardist, if they can play and sing.
The guitarist should be playing either small practice amps, Fender Princeton Chorus twins, or a Marshall half stack. Anything else is unacceptable. They should be playing either Fender Stratocasters, Mustangs, Lead I or II's, Epiphone Les Paul knockoffs, or any other assorted variations on this theme. NO GIBSONS! They are not to played until you get old enough and rich enough and pretentious enough to play them. This is a garageband, remember....
The bass should be some kind of Fender Bass, or appear to be one, or a Hohner or Hohner look alike, a la Paul McCartney, played through either an old Peavey keyboard or bass amp, or some kind of half stack system.
The drummer should be playing an old, stained set, preferably a five piece that was sitting in his uncle's basement for years. The front bass head should be removed and a pillow should be stuffed into the bass. The cymbals should all be in various states of green and/or cracked. The drummer should invest all his hard-earned lawn mowing money in a double bass pedal. That is the only thing on the set that can appear to be new.
Any keyboard should be either an old Hammond B-3 or Fender Rhodes, played through an old amp that cuts in and out. This is very important.
The microphones should be plugged into any old amp that is found lying around, using some old Shure SM58's or 57's that happened to be found in the lead singer's mother's underwear draw. The question of how he acquired them should never be asked. I repeat, this is a question that should never be asked!
Repertoire:
A proper garageband should steep itself in the classic garageband repertoire. They should be sure to play Louie-Louie, Brown-Eyed Girl, and Beatles tune, but especially I Saw Her Standing There. Some Creedence, Knockin' on Heaven's Door, a Buddy Holly tune or three, and any random song that any of their parents either sang to them or played for them when they were kids. The secret to this last one is to use reverb. Always use reverb....
After this elementary beginning, the fledgling garageband should study and play the music of any number of 1990's era garagebands. Pearl Jam, Green Day, and Weezer are almost all they need. They should practice until they can play all of Pearl Jam's Ten, Greenday's Dookie, and Weezer's Blue album. Top of the cake with Tom Petty's Mary Jane's Last Dance, and they will no longer be a fledgling garageband, but a true garageband ready to blast their way forward into rock and roll stardom.
Conclusion:
Be sure to play most of the music with more distortion, reverb, and feedback than you think you would normally like. Overindulgence is sometimes how we learn. Have fun and remember: wear earplugs so you can't hear the neighbors yelling at you to turn it down...
Addendum:
A fledgling garageband should also be writing it's own songs. The songs should have serious meaning to the composer/lyricist only, whilst making little sense to anyone else. It's how you learn....the drummer should be discouraged from writing his or her own songs, as history has shown us that drummer songwriters, with the notable exception of Levon Helm, tend to compose awful, meaningless songs that make people like me (people with good musical taste) want to smack someone. Any song by Rush, Genesis, or Phil Collins can be used as an example of how not to write a song.
If you have any good video of your fledgling garageband or would like to be a part of mine, please email me at Markislem@gmail.com. Please attach pictures of your set-up and your garage.....
Weapons of choice:
Two guitarists, one of them preferably the lead singer/rhythm guitarist, the other guy the lead guitarist, hopefully with the capability of doing some backround vocals.
One bassist, also a singer
One drummer, hopefully a singer, not a hack like Phil Collins.
Add to this one keyboardist, if they can play and sing.
The guitarist should be playing either small practice amps, Fender Princeton Chorus twins, or a Marshall half stack. Anything else is unacceptable. They should be playing either Fender Stratocasters, Mustangs, Lead I or II's, Epiphone Les Paul knockoffs, or any other assorted variations on this theme. NO GIBSONS! They are not to played until you get old enough and rich enough and pretentious enough to play them. This is a garageband, remember....
The bass should be some kind of Fender Bass, or appear to be one, or a Hohner or Hohner look alike, a la Paul McCartney, played through either an old Peavey keyboard or bass amp, or some kind of half stack system.
The drummer should be playing an old, stained set, preferably a five piece that was sitting in his uncle's basement for years. The front bass head should be removed and a pillow should be stuffed into the bass. The cymbals should all be in various states of green and/or cracked. The drummer should invest all his hard-earned lawn mowing money in a double bass pedal. That is the only thing on the set that can appear to be new.
Any keyboard should be either an old Hammond B-3 or Fender Rhodes, played through an old amp that cuts in and out. This is very important.
The microphones should be plugged into any old amp that is found lying around, using some old Shure SM58's or 57's that happened to be found in the lead singer's mother's underwear draw. The question of how he acquired them should never be asked. I repeat, this is a question that should never be asked!
Repertoire:
A proper garageband should steep itself in the classic garageband repertoire. They should be sure to play Louie-Louie, Brown-Eyed Girl, and Beatles tune, but especially I Saw Her Standing There. Some Creedence, Knockin' on Heaven's Door, a Buddy Holly tune or three, and any random song that any of their parents either sang to them or played for them when they were kids. The secret to this last one is to use reverb. Always use reverb....
After this elementary beginning, the fledgling garageband should study and play the music of any number of 1990's era garagebands. Pearl Jam, Green Day, and Weezer are almost all they need. They should practice until they can play all of Pearl Jam's Ten, Greenday's Dookie, and Weezer's Blue album. Top of the cake with Tom Petty's Mary Jane's Last Dance, and they will no longer be a fledgling garageband, but a true garageband ready to blast their way forward into rock and roll stardom.
Conclusion:
Be sure to play most of the music with more distortion, reverb, and feedback than you think you would normally like. Overindulgence is sometimes how we learn. Have fun and remember: wear earplugs so you can't hear the neighbors yelling at you to turn it down...
Addendum:
A fledgling garageband should also be writing it's own songs. The songs should have serious meaning to the composer/lyricist only, whilst making little sense to anyone else. It's how you learn....the drummer should be discouraged from writing his or her own songs, as history has shown us that drummer songwriters, with the notable exception of Levon Helm, tend to compose awful, meaningless songs that make people like me (people with good musical taste) want to smack someone. Any song by Rush, Genesis, or Phil Collins can be used as an example of how not to write a song.
If you have any good video of your fledgling garageband or would like to be a part of mine, please email me at Markislem@gmail.com. Please attach pictures of your set-up and your garage.....